Our minds are extremely good at telling us lies about our ability to get through the loss of a loved one. It can trick us into believing that things won’t get better, that our life is forever changed for the worse and nothing good will ever happen to us again.
I am here to tell you that you can change those lies around. You might be asleep to the world around you but now is the time to wake up. When you wake up to the possibilities, healing and good fortune happens.
However, you cannot be complacent to seeing this get better. You are an active participant in this process. You need to get your passion back. Maybe it is a passion for your life, family, friends, hobbies, or work. And how do you get that passion back? Start with expecting things to get better. Talk as if things are already better.
Step into the fullness of life you deserve. This is a critical time. Do not take it lightly. Stir up your faith. Look for the good things that are yet to come. They are closer than you think.
Wake up to what is in store for you. Keep the door open. You are closer every day to having your circumstances turn around. You are closer than you expect to experiencing joy again. You are closer to seeing blessings just by believing they are happening.
Are you awake to what the future has in store for you? Do you recognize your time is coming?
The opposite of high time is low time. Do you tell yourself you will never get over your loss? Do you tell yourself you can’t live without your loved one? Have you accepted the new health challenges since your loss? Have you not tried to get back on your feet, feeling like you have been beaten down one too many times?
With this negative self-talk, you will admit defeat and all those lies become your truth, your reality. As a result, you may stay stuck in your grief, admitting depression and leaving a spouse, children, or job behind as you waste away.
Think about what you are longing for. While you may mourn your loss, you might crave joy and happiness. Look for it. Be awake for it. It will happen when you least expect it.
I know that you are grieving which is a time in you may want to be part of a community that understands what you are experiencing. A grief Facebook group may feel like it is the solution and a way to be in the high times. They are not a good long-term solution.
Think about this. Every day many people join these groups with fresh and raw pain, something you have already experienced. Each time you read one of their posts, your own grief resurfaces. Hearing fresh stories every day does not give you the time or space to heal.
I understand wanting support from others who are experiencing the same challenges. It is spending too much time with them that gets in the way of your healing and growth. The more frequently you are brought into the fresh grief, the more difficult it will be for you to move forward.
I suggest finding someone that is where you want to be albeit happy, joyful, or grateful. Spend time with them. Learn from them. Remember the lessons you learned a long time ago. The people who you spend time with are who you yourself will become. Spending time with a depressed person gives you permission to become depressed. Chose wisely who you spend your time with.
Chose those who lift you up and will help you aspire to the high times, that things will get better and encourage you. Get around people where sadness and depression are not the norm. You will see the positive impact it has on you.
This is what I do know. Life will never be the same as it was before your loss. However, you can learn to live your life without them.
If you are ready to understand your grief, schedule an appointment with me today.